If you want to be a working screenwriter, it really helps if ...

I’ve had a bit of fun with Lawrence of Arabia imagery and put together these memes. If you want to be a working screenwriter - give these a bit of thought.

Admittedly, some of the below Lawrence of Arabia-themed memes are just for laughs. I do hope you spot them.

Starting out, it may be painful with rejection after rejection … and then when you’re hired, you will be tearing your hair out more than a few times as you wade through script notes and deliver draft after draft. You don’t have to become a masochist - you don’t have to like the hurt. But if you want this business to be your world, you have to learn to not mind the hurt.

Far from every battle is worth fighting. Ideally, your best friend is your agent - and if you find yourself in a tricky situation, just nod and say you’ll think about it and walk away. Then call your agent or manager and they’ll sort it out. Stick to creative battles about the plot, the characters, the twists, etc. - your energy shouldn’t be wasted on anything else.

Talking about ‘tearing your hair out’ … the business of film is a mad one and you’ll inevitably be working with people who know far less about screenwriting, but have egos and power the size of Mt. Everest (well, they think so, anyway). So, because of power structures, you’ll end up feeling like a pinball occasionally. Just go with the flow and learn to laugh about that latest moronic ideas coming your way.

Being a screenwriter can feel solitary (and we like it that way) - but we better make sure we don’t fight alone. Yes, there’s agent and manager on our side - by don’t stop there. Be kind, be a decent human being, to assistants, to drivers, to whomever. It’s a journey and it helps to have company (and allies) along the way.

Most screenwriters are terrified of meetings with executives, producers, directors, all the traditional higher-ups. Here’s what’s always worked for me, I always tried to say as little as possible. Instead of yacking (which tends to happen when we’re nervous), I’d have my notebook open, I’d listen, I’d not, I’d take notes and occasionally I’d ask questions. I’d end meetings by thanking everyone and that I’d now go back into my cave, think about everything and then get back to them. This would always lead to better meetings, filled with ideas instead of confrontations.

I’ve already mentioned the madness of the movie business. Let’s be honest here, if you’re not a little nuts yourself, why on Earth would you want to get into this world where the chances of any of your scripts ever getting made are always below zero? So keep that in mind - enjoy your madness - not to the extreme, of course, but know that everyone’s a little crazy, and that’s just as it must be to stay sane.

You have to believe in yourself, in your story, in your characters, in your talent. If you don’t, no one else will. The Force, in the case of screenwriting, is your unique voice. It takes guts to not try to write as someone else has done so successfully, it takes guts not to write as suggest by screenwriting gurus or producers. It takes guts to be you, the real you, with your unique voice. If you believe in that voice (and if you’re blessed with more than a bit of talent), then the Force will indeed be with you.

I love being God. We are the creators. We create world. We bring people together in love and in hate, and we tear them apart with heartbreak and villains and catastrophes. We get to do whatever we want (whether any producer ever shows an interest is another matter) and it is from that God-like fervor that we create truly original (it happens!) stories.

Writing takes time, and most of it is not spent in the company of others (Thank God!). So you better enjoying being on your own, because that’ll be the default for weeks and months and many more months. If spending an exorbitant amount of time on your own feels wrong to you, then maybe writing isn’t for you. There is the collaborative aspect, of course - but usually the first draft (and all of your spec scripts) is you and you alone. So, ideally you love your solitude - the flipside is that too much is dangerous. Don’t forget to mingle with the outside world (family, friends, loved ones) - they are the ones who keep you sane (not your solitude).

Most film projects are a matter of many months, if not years. And so every producer will think twice about whom they want in their life for a very long time. If they have several good screenwriters they can choose from, they’re not likely to be the stiff (or the asshole, for that matter) - they pick someone who’s easy-going, someone you can get along with, someone you can grab a brew with. Look I know, many of us writers are introverts and more comfortable within our cave. But learn to mingle - it doesn’t hurt and you can go back to the cave afterwards. Trust me, in terms of a career as a professional writer, not being a stiff is quite important.

That’s the big one, isn’t it? Yes, the rejections will keep on coming. Yes, the notes will keep on coming. Yes, the madness will continue in a thousand different shades. But you have the stamina. You have the discipline. You have that love and that passion for the world of film. You dream in Courier font and script format. You’re unhappy when you don’t wrote. You need it as it needs you. If that’s you, yes, well then truly nothing will be able to stop you.

And that’s it for today - have you had a good week and wishing you a better one ahead. Cheers! D